


A Discussion on God Over Piña Coladas

by osaa_pax



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:14:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25324474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/osaa_pax/pseuds/osaa_pax
Summary: A very, very drunk Nile asks Nicky about his faith. Nicky tries his best, but God, religion, and faith are very complicated when you've been alive for nearly a thousand years.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 141





	A Discussion on God Over Piña Coladas

**Author's Note:**

> Joe was right when he said Nicky's heart "overflows with a kindness of which this world is not worthy of". 
> 
> This has not been beta-reviewed, nor have I finished the comics, so apologies in advance for any inaccuracies or incorrectness!

Nile is drunk. Like, really, really drunk. And that’s saying something, especially coming from Nicky, who can clearly remember when people drank more wine, beer, and ale than water, who was in Scotland in the 1400s when whiskey was invented, who has probably tried every fermented drink known to mankind. 

It’s Joe’s fault, Nicky is left to conclude. Normally it would have been easy to blame on resident alcoholics Booker and Andy, but, well, it’s ten months into Booker’s exile, and Andy is nowhere to be found, presumably sulking and staring at the ocean. And Joe’s the one who went grocery shopping and bought pineapple juice and enough rum to satiate an army. 

“So… Nicky…” Nile slurs, “Why do you still believe in God?”

Slightly uncomfortable with the turn their conversation has suddenly taken, Nicky glares at Joe, who is bent over, gasping for air from laughing so hard. Of course, Nile has questions about God, and it makes sense that she would ask him, the one who lit a candle for each of them in every church they passed by. And Nicky could tell that she was struggling, with Booker’s absence, with Andy’s sudden mortality, and most importantly, with her family’s grief. 

Last week, Copley had gotten word to them that Nile’s funeral was to be held in a few days. Nicky didn’t know what strings had been pulled to make Nile’s disappearance seem legitimate, but he reasoned that it was probably better none of them knew. 

They were hiding out – resting – on an island in the Bahamas. Quiet, private, relaxing. Far from Chicago, where they presumed the funeral was going to be held. Far from London, where suspicion around the violence at the Merrick headquarters was still being investigated. 

“Nicky…come on, tell me!” Nile giggles, pouring herself more of the hodge-podge piña colada. Damn Joe for getting them a house with a blender, Nicky thinks, estimating that this is probably around Nile’s twentieth tropical drink of the evening. 

“Yes, Nicoló, tell her about your God,” Joe chokes out, still chortling heartily. Joe never did well with sweet, tropical drinks, Nicky knows this, but in this moment, he wishes Joe was just a little more sober. Then again, sober Joe was overly defensive about religion, so maybe it’s for the best.

“What is it you want to know, Nile?” Nicky responds, pushing a glass of water across the table towards Nile. She ignores it. 

“Like… with all this shit that you’ve seen in the world, why do you think God is worth it,” she asks. 

“It’s not about God,” Nicky ventures, knowing full well that she wasn’t going to remember any of this the next morning, “It hasn’t been about God or Jesus since, well, around the 18th century.”

“But, like, didn’t you go to war for the Pope? And for God?” Nile presses. 

“Not just that,” Nicky admits, “I was actually a priest.” 

At this Nile spits out her piña colada. “What the fuck?” 

Joe, now silent, smirks and crosses his arms. He’s heard Nicky try to explain his faith before, and Nicky can tell from the look on Joe’s face that he’s very curious how Nicky’s going to approach it this time. 

“Yes, so I was definitely a believer,” Nicky gives in, “I had an unshakeable faith for a long time. But after six hundred years of violence and witnessing all the unspeakable things men did to innocent people in the name of God, I couldn’t really take it much longer.” 

“Yeah…” Nile breathes, “I get that,” 

“Plus, that God, and that religion thought we were sinners for loving each other,” Joe interjects forcefully.

Sighing, Nicky shifts in his seat to face Nile.

“But I guess you’re asking why I still pray and light candles and all of that?” he asks. 

“Right, yes,” Nile replies, eyes near bloodshot, “What makes you still believe in something?”

Nicky sighs again. He’s grappled with this question for a millennium. He’s seen how deeply Joe has struggled with his faith and his participation in a Holy War, how Quynh, Lykon, and Andy struggled with the idea of something bigger. And he really didn’t think they’d be having this conversation right now.

Looking at his hands, Nicky exhales deeply and attempts to give Nile a good enough explanation. 

“Because if you don’t believe in something, what’s the point? I don’t know if I believe in a god. But it’s comforting to think that there has to be a reason for us, for the world, for the good and the bad. And it’s faith that helps me work through the idea that maybe I’m not meant to know the reason.” 

Nicky doesn’t hear a reply from Nile. Looking up, he sees that she’s dozed off. Nicky glances at Joe. Even he’s nodding off, the traitor. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Nicky sighs and gets up to take his companions to their beds. 

Hours later, Andy returns and Nicky, still awake, leaves Joe’s tight embrace to check in on her.   
“How are you?” he asks Andy as she sips some water. “Surviving,” she responds with an exhale Nicky feels she’s been holding in all night. 

“What did you guys get up to?” Andy asks, moving to the fridge to scrounge up leftovers. 

“Oh, you know Joe and Nile. Had a little too much fun making sugary tropical drinks,” Nicky responds, leaning against the counter. 

Andy smirks. 

“Nile asked about God,” Nicky admits, not quite sure why he’s telling Andy. 

Andy just sighs. “The funeral was today, yes?” 

Nicky nods. He’d never really thought about his funeral. Did they have one for him? Did they give Joe a funeral? 

“She asked the right person,” Andy says, looking at Nicky with sadness. “I’m sure you gave her a thoughtful, hopeful answer, and that’s what she needs right now.” And with that, Andy retreats to her room with a plate of lukewarm food and a beer, leaving Nicky alone to wonder if he said the right thing.


End file.
